The Second Best Time

Sometimes I don't exactly know where all this fire to do and accomplish comes from... I feel like I used to be very much like this in high school, but it's been a while since this trait was so dominant in my personality. It has become a bit overwhelming! I know that a big part of it is that I really want to start our family, but in realizing that I also want to do EVERYTHING as if I won't be able to do anything anymore as soon as I have a kid. And I think this is partly true! I mean... I probably won't get my yoga certification, be a professional fire dancer AND a spinning and sculpt teacher, at least for a couple of years, if I start a family now. But that doesn't mean it won't ever happen! It CAN happen later in life, and I have to keep reminding myself that I am not that old.

And while I am very proud of the things I am working to accomplish now, I also have begun to feel like life is just thing after thing with absolutely no time for reflection. It's almost like it's an addiction. I keep feeding it and feeding it, but I end up feeling scattered. I love my fire dancing, it's an absolute joy, especially when I get lost in the movement. I love working at the yoga studio, because I feel like I'm helping out my community and learning how to run a business. I love teaching sculpt, because I'm gaining confidence exponentially and standing on my own two feet as an instructor. I love taking yoga, it keeps me sane and involved in life, and I would love nothing more than to get my yoga certification. I love getting my CPR training and trying to get my cycle class together because, while all the things I named above are great, I'm not actually making money at any of them yet which is a good part of the reason I'm trying to do all this! And work! Well, that's a whole other big part of the pie, and I am actually busy there and feel like I'm growing, so it's not so bad either.

So it's all great... but whew! When do I get off the train? When was the last time I cooked dinner at home???

I was talking to Denise at Your Neighborhood Studio tonight, and she recommended that I reflect a bit and focus more. Like pick what I want to do. Which I have to agree with, seeing as I'm really spinning in circles. But it's so hard when you really enjoy it all! I mean, if I could I would give up the 9-5, but seeing as that makes the rest possible it's not so much of an option!

Where is all of this energy to accomplish coming from, though? It's a real question. Am I going through a normal 30 year old stage that will calm down? Is it still the weather, and will I relax when the summer winds start to blow? Will I just get pregnant eventually and put the dreams aside? And the best question of all - WHERE exactly were all these ambitions during the decade of my 20s when I actually had real time to accomplish them all????

Oh well. My boss has a quote on his desk:
The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is today.