In yoga tonight I was reminded of a couple of things. At one point in a hairy half moon, our amazing translucent instructor Vanessa said "I was reminded that the amount of freedom in our lives is directly proportionate to the amount we can let go." I liked this. Meaning, if we want to find freedom in this crazy pose, we also have to not be afraid to let go. Let go to the point of falling, if need be, in order to find the pose. Although, I think in life this is true but also needs to be tempered. Take my family, for the most part. I mean, my brother, my sisters... they're really darn good at "letting go." I mean, nothing bothers them. They can destroy their bodies with substances, all in the name of "letting go" and "finding freedom." So although I see the value in finding this freedom... where are we if have no ground to support us when we fall? So, to get another yoga lesson, there is also balance. Freedom is only good as there is structure to hold us. I could not be finding my body to release and learn these lessons if I did not actually come to yoga instead of sitting in front of the tv.
I'm not sure if any of this is making sense. It's been a long day. And I am starting to really miss my hubby. The break has allowed me a lot of time to devote to experiences I might not if he were not here, like blogging! And more yoga than usual, and fire spinning. And I've been re-learning stuff, like how much I can handle myself. When he is here, I tend to rely on him a lot for silly things like going to the store, etc. And it's all not that hard to do by myself.
I guess I hope I can hold onto these lessons when he gets back. I've got about 2 weeks left. But I also find myself getting a little brittle, hard, and I long for his arms to hold me for about 2 days straight and thaw me out.
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